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Friday, March 28, 2008

I guess my mood has been morose here lately

Have you ever done something you're so ashamed of you can't shake it? I'm still feeling horrible about the argument I had with my friend just before he left here. I finally left him a phone message apologizing, knowing he wouldn't answer my call, but I still feel terrible.

Another friend of mine, one I can count on to not pull any punches, but in a nice way, told me once I had explained the whole story to him, "Wow, dude, you really suck." He was also the one who told me I should call to apologize. He reasoned that I had the time to leave the crappy message in the first place therefore I should take the time to call and apologize. I finally got up the nerve to do it and it didn't help me feel any better at all. I've been out of shape since it happened and I'll probably stay out of shape until either enough time passes or I get a call back.

I hate it when people I care about leave and I do this but I really went overboard on this one, my heart was hurting that much. The saddest part of all of this is I have no one to blame but myself and my temper. I've lost a good friend all because I couldn't control any longer what I was feeling and I let it out in a negative way.

“Whenever a man does a thoroughly stupid thing, it is always from the noblest motives.”
Oscar Wilde (Irish Poet, Novelist, Dramatist and Critic, 1854-1900)